pronounced "relic": "Instead of one little ole' mouth..."

"...we got two to feed.

Instead of one little ole' diaper, two is what we need.

Instead of one bawlin' babe we got a wailin' duet!

This is sho' nuff more than we thought we'd get:

Well now we got double trouble.

Well now we got double fun.

Well now we got double everything.

Cuz two came instead of one!"

So goes the first verse of the song "Double Trouble" my mom wrote back in 1984 when my twin sister Emily and I were born. I can't say we know yet how much "double trouble" and "double fun" we'll really have when these babies get home, but I am getting some experience with "two little ole' mouths" to feed...

First of all, I love nursing my babies. I've been very lucky to have extremely positive and sweet experiences breastfeeding my first three. Being able to give baby Julia all the nutrition she needed was magical to me. Gabe was a very enthusiastic eater and plumped up like crazy. Evy latching on immediately after being born was a thrill I'll never forget. Also a positive note, my milk supply has been and is very abundant. (The nurses said I'm a superstar for all the milk I bring in. You know that's right.) So naturally I am excited to take on the challenge of nursing two at once.

The only thing is, these guys just don't have what it takes yet! They aren't developmentally ready to go for it completely, unlike the full-term babies I'm used to. I started working on getting them to latch just last week. (Once they were on the low-flow nasal cannula we could begin.) I was encouraged with Daniel's first try and thought, "Surely he'll get the hang of this in the next few days. Michael will too. And we'll be home!" Not quite. I was discouraged when Daniel was less enthusiastic at our next try. And the next. And the next they both just slept right through. Yep, I was discouraged. I didn't realize that their little premature brains, are, well, premature.

Jonny and I attended a class at the hospital about brain development of preemie babies and what we can do to help them. It is natural for them to be so sleepy, as they should technically still be doing that inside of me! And the sucking reflex takes time to develop. As does the endurance to keep sucking. So really, it's just a matter of time. And that takes patience.

Now that I understand even those few basic things (which seems obvious, I know. But when my boys were born so big I figured they'd be home in no time. Size isn't everything!) I am being much more patient with these little guys. The progress they've made in the past two days is very encouraging to me. But I'm going to obey the Occupational Therapist who told me I can't "boo-hoo" when we do the test weights after nursing and see they've gained nothing. Two weeks in the NICU has seemed like twice that. But tomorrow they'll be 36 weeks, and a lot of progress happens (and can happen quickly) between 36 and 38 weeks. So it'll probably be between 2 and 3 more weeks. It'll be so exciting to see them really get the hang of nursing. This morning they both latched so well, sucked and swallowed on and off for a good 8-10 minutes, and even gained just a tiny bit of weight from that. I am so proud of my little boys! And I'll continue to pray for patience as I give them quality nursing experiences and wait for them to signal when they are ready for quantity. Could be a day, could be a week. But I know they'll be home sooner than later and these NICU visits will be a memory. And not a bad one. I enjoy the quiet times I spend there with the boys. It is a kind of second home for now. But not for long. I can't wait to have my family all together all the time. Then I guess I'll really know what "Double Everything" means!?

Daniel

These pictures were taken by my sister Cami a week ago. They look so different to me now already! Micheal has since been put on the low-flow cannula like Daniel's.